The End of Myself

2 Corinthians 12:9

"And He has said to me, 'My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.' Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me."

Whether by circumstances or even my own attitude, I find it is God's grace that I come to the end of myself. Motherhood is no picnic, and I often find myself so frustrated, stressed, anxious, weary, or depressed that I just want to give up. It is there - in that weakness - that My God stretches me and molds me to make me stronger and more like Christ, His Son.

I am beginning to realize it isn't just about relying on God; I still come to the end of myself. Rather, coming to the end of myself is not bad, but something that must occur before I can truly live in God's strength. I don't have to get frustrated, etc. to come to the end of myself and reach that strength. Instead, I should purpose to go straight to the end of myself - to my weakness and His strength - from the beginning. 

Before I come to the end of myself, I rely on my plan, my physical strength, or my talents. Living in God's strength requires looking ahead at eternity, recognizing my humble position under God, and being ready for whatever way He would have this task accomplished. Certainly, I should have a plan, but I shouldn't rely on it. I shouldn't place my hope or my emotional balance on it. That just ruins my contentment if God has a different (and thus, better) plan for me. How tragic!

My God is greater than I, His power beyond my imagining. This is His world I live in; how can I hope to navigate it in my own strength?  Why would I want to?

I thank God for the end of myself, for the place where I live in my humble Weakness and the Victory of His strength.