Gentle and Lowly

Exodus 34:6-7a
"The Lord, the Lord God, compassionate and merciful, slow to anger and abounding in faithfulness and truth; who keeps faithfulness for thousands, who forgives wrongdoing, violation of His law, and sin; yet He will by no means leave the guilty unpunished..."

Matthew 11:29
"'Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.'"

Is God angry with His children? Perhaps you've struggled with this idea, as I have. You know you're saved, you know you aren't condemned to hell (Romans 8:1), but you still see God as angry with you every time you sin. How could He not be? Isn't He constantly grading our performance, tracking every detail in His Book of Life?

Yet what drove God to call His children to Him in the first place? Was it our performance? Our obedience? Our moral excellence? No. God called us because of His own unconditional love. It isn't about us. It's about Him. God knew every sin we would commit beforehand, and He still chose us; it wasn't about us - it was about showing His glory. 

I submit to you: the fact we aren't perfect is the very thing God uses to draw others to Himself through us. We don't draw people to God by being perfect; people are drawn by the knowledge that God loves us despite our imperfections - despite our sin. Contrary to our instinctual reactions, we shouldn't hide our sins and pretend we're perfect. Instead, we are to be transparent about our sin and repent of it. In this way, God has turned even our sins into a way to glorify God - to point out His compassion, grace, and mercy.

As Paul says in Romans 6:15 this does not give us license to sin, but it does mean God expected us to sin. This is Plan A. God does not need a contingency plan. God must punish sin, but He has already dealt that punishment - on His only begotten Son. There is no anger left for you, His child, saved by His love, mercy, and grace. These are what is left after the sacrifice of the holy and perfect Lamb.

I think so often of my own frustration with my children when they do not obey, and think God must be so frustrated with me. Yet that very word - frustrate - means to "prevent (a plan or attempted action) from progressing, succeeding, or being fulfilled." No plan of God's can be thwarted, or frustrated (Job 42:2). God is not like a human parent. 

So what is the significance of this? God's heart toward His children is not one of anger - even when we sin. He paid that price and it is finished. Now, it's time to repent, and move on - which God is here to help with! He doesn't call me to repent before I come to Him; He calls me to come to Him so I can repent! This is (a piece of) the grace and wonder of God: that every part of our salvation and sanctification (ongoing progress toward Christ-likeness) is performed by His own hand. We rely on Him every step of the way - or we face the natural consequences of attempting to do it ourselves.

These natural consequences are not God's anger, they are His discipline. Discipline and anger are not the same thing. Discipline is solely meant for the good of the one being disciplined. It is meant for instruction, not punishment. Again, that punishment has already been taken. Discipline is instruction, and we are foolish not to accept it.

If you struggle with thinking of God as angry, or struggle with understanding how He could be "gentle and humble of heart," I would highly suggest reading Dane Ortlund's book, Gentle and Lowly. It is a beautiful encouragement and insight into the heart of our Lord.

I thank God He is gentle and lowly. He doesn't lord my failures over me, or drive me into the ground with guilt, but rather that He grants me mercy, and then even beyond that gives me grace to be in relationship with Him - with Love Himself.

To Approach Your Throne

Hebrews 4:16

"Therefore let us draw near with confidence to the throne of grace, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need."

Thank You, Lord, that I can approach Your throne with confidence, that I may make my requests known to You without the guilt of my sins looming or keeping me from You.

You lost Your Son to agony for a time so that my sins would be erased - and even such a weight of sin was no match for Your power. Your Son rose again to advocate for me and allow me in Your presence. Your comforting, loving, humbling, majestic and awesome presence. Thank You for that amazing grace.

I often forget what a privilege it is to approach Your throne, or even that my prayers and requests are presented to the Almighty God, Maker of Heaven and Earth. You gave me Your relationship, and its worth is beyond all my imagining. Make me mindful of the privilege, but also the confidence of Your welcome, as well as the power of Your love to grant our requests according to Your will, which is simultaneously Your glory and our good.

Your Faithfulness

Dear Lord,

My constant prayer seems to be that You would continually point me back to You and that my focus wouldn’t stray.  I know that focus on You is where I want to be, and yet, my focus constantly strays - mostly to myself.  Thank You, Lord, for Your faithfulness (and answer to prayer) to point me back to You.  Thank You that You orchestrate each moment, circumstance, etc. toward Your purpose of making Your children more like Your Son - including even me.

Your faithfulness pairs with Your Grace and Love to bring me back to You.  I cannot conceive of such love and forgiveness.  Thank You so much, Lord.  I do pray that You continue to do so - if only to keep my focus on that fact that You will.

In Jesus’ Name, amen.

Vitamin E

Dear Lord,

Thank You for watching over my son this weekend while he played with us outside.  Sunscreen hadn’t even crossed my mind as we worked to ready part of my in-laws’ backyard to put sod in.  It wasn’t until my father-in-law said something later in the day that I realized the red on his cheeks probably wasn’t from the strange rash he’s been getting, but from a little too much sun.  Through my own sunburn experiences (and the loving ministrations of a friend), I thank You that You had already taught me the wonders of Vitamin E!

Again, thank You as You watched over him.  You know that he woke several times that night - I can only guess from having rubbed his cheeks in his sleep - and he also came down sick with a cold shared by his cousin.  I spread that E over his cheeks twice in the night, and by morning, I could barely tell that his cheeks had a little extra pink.  Thank You for my previous experience (and the knowledge of the concentration of no less than 12,000 IU), and for Your healing.  It didn’t even seem to bother him the next day.

Lord, when I fail according to the world’s standards, You are there to show me that everything is in Your hands.  You turn and use those “failures” for Your glory, and make Your Victory known.  Thank You for healing my son through Your gift of Vitamin E!

In Jesus’ Name, amen.

"Reel Her In!"

Dear Lord,

I am thankful that You bring me back to You when I stray.  You send little reminders and checks in my life to remind me that my focus should be on You.  I really appreciate that.  You leave me the choice, yet You remind me of Your joy, and the joy of living for and within You.  How can I not come back to You when faced with the reminder of who You really are and what You have done for me?

Yet, as You know, sometimes I still don’t want to come back.  Thank You for Your forgiveness, grace, and mercy.  Sometimes it takes more than a gentle reminder to turn my foolish heart.  Thank You for the love You exhibit in being willing to exercise less gentle reminders.  I would far rather feel Your discipline for a moment, than to turn from You entirely (if that were possible in the face of Your love and grace).  Thank You, Lord, that You “reel me in.”

In Jesus' name, amen.

Weekly Impressions - Lover of My Soul

Any time I struggle with sin, it seems that the first thing that I need to do is preach the gospel to myself.  If I feel unloved, lonely, despairing, etc., then to recognize that Christ knows exactly what I am going through, and took on all of my sins and the disregard for Him that those sins reflect, and put them on Himself to suffer and die for me so that I might live in eternity with Him.  I owe Him more than everything.  

He didn’t stop there, either.  He rose again to conquer death and lives with a victory that overcomes all evil.  No matter what evil I am going through in this world, He has overcome the world, and He uses my circumstances, etc. for my good and keeps my soul.  No matter how bad or sinful I am, His love covers me with His righteousness, and keeps my soul.

My God is an awesome God, and nothing can shake His power or His love.  God is bigger than everything… put together… and He doesn’t lose track of a single hair on the head of His loved ones.  I am His… and there’s no escaping!  What a wondrous love!  I seek to hang my head in the shame of my actions, yet He lifts my head and smiles on me as a favored one in His grace.  Christ paid the penalty for my sin and “…there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” (Romans 8:1)  I am to confess, repent, and then live in His joy.  The joy of His love, of His teaching, of His Victory.  Christ is mine, and I am His.

We (His children) live by the grace of God.  Not only His grace to allow us to draw each and every breath, but the grace He bestows upon us to draw upon His Divine Power for daily life.  We can live daily in His victory, if we can but lift our eyes from the waves of circumstance, etc. to the eyes of Christ.  His piercing, loving gaze.  I am so thankful for my Savior, and I pray that I would be cognizant moment-by-moment of my soul in His loving grip.

Worth

I am thankful that my worth is found in Christ.  My perfect Savior took on my sins and paid the penalty for them, lavishing His grace and mercy upon me.  I find my worth in His love.  

It is easy for me to forget that His love is not based upon anything that I do.  My actions do not change His love for me, nor the amount of pleasure that He takes within me.  Certainly, my actions reflect upon Him, and when I sin, I am a poor witness of His love, but when He looks at me He doesn’t see me; He sees His Son, my Savior.

The measure of His grace astounds me.  I am so thankful that what I do doesn’t have to be driven by a sense of worth, but is driven by a desire to please Him.  If I don’t please Him, I have but to confess, repent, and move on.  He doesn’t tell me to wallow in sorrow; He is not a god of sorrow, but of joy.

Thank You, Lord, for Your love, and the worth that You grant me.

A Gentle Spirit

Philippians 4:4-5

“Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, rejoice!  Let your gentle spirit be known to all men. The Lord is near.”

What do you think of when you think of the word rejoice?  If you’re like me, you think of upraised hands and shouts of joy.  Exuberance, perhaps.  So I find it interesting that this verse follows an imperative command of “Rejoice!” with “Let your gentle spirit be known to all men.”  Rejoice and gentle don’t typically go together in my mind.

Yet it didn’t take much more thought to consider what it is to experience the Joy of the Lord.  It is - in a word that doesn’t truly sum it all up - contentment.  Paul describes various practices of contentment before coming out and saying it in verse 11 (that he has learned to be content no matter his circumstances), but they are certainly all linked in his logical line of thought.

Joy and contentment are interesting things; they each tend to bring out the other.  As I considered my practices in my marriage, I realized that I am learning more and more how to be joyful and content within it.  When I practice biblical submission to my husband, my gentle spirit encourages him and I feel content in that role - it is God’s calling on my life and that brings me joy.

I rejoice in the Lord that He has taught me to have a gentle spirit.  I thank Him for His grace in those times that I choose differently - as well as my husband’s grace.  May I come to understand what it is to have a gentle spirit all the more as time goes on, and thus increase my joy.

When I let guilt at my sins enter the equation, my joy falters.  Guilt traps me in sorrow that leads nowhere.  Conviction leads me to confession and repentance, from which point I can move forward in the Lord.  When I accept God's grace, I can rejoice in God's gift even of grace itself.

Is there something in your marriage that you have allowed to stifle your joy in the Lord?