Work

There has been so much to do at work this year that it has felt as though I haven’t had a chance to catch my breath.  My coworkers and I have had an extra event (a Biblical Counseling class) that we have been running for the last 3 months, and we just finished!  God has been good and enabled me to keep up with everything that had to be done (what a blessing!).  I am, however, looking forward to being able to catch up on all of the things that have been waiting for me to get to them.

I was reflecting on my work load, and realized that I am truly thankful for having work to do - and even for having so much.  I enjoy my work, and enjoy doing it to the best of my ability.  It’s a great way to honor God.

Genesis 2:15 says, “Then the Lord God took the man and put him into the garden of Eden to cultivate it and keep it.”  I believe that God created us to work; it brings Him glory.  So I am thankful that I can bring glory to God in my work, which also brings me His Joy.

Home Movies

Our year-and-a-half old son loves watching the little home movies that we take of him on our iPhones.  I find it amusing that he isn’t very interested in the clips that don’t feature his cute little figure.  As his attention span grows longer, he will watch them “Again!” (which is actually communicated by his own variation of the ASL sign “REPEAT” along with the sound “kee”)... and again and again.  It’s one of his favorite things to do.

We are trying to teach him not to immediately ask for a movie upon first seeing Grandma (as opposed to Grammy), because she, too, has an iPhone.  He uses his own variation of the ASL sign “MOVIE” when he sees her, so we generally won’t let him watch immediately.  When we do let him watch "movies," though, it is so adorable.

I rather treasure it, because my tremendously busy little man will climb into my lap and sit still.  His brow turns a bit serious and sometimes furrows in concentration.  He knows how to swipe to the next or previous home movie, and to press the little play arrow that pops up in the middle of the screen, so I can really just sit and enjoy cuddling with him while he’s occupied.

I thank the Lord that I can take and play home movies of and for my little man.  I pray for God’s patience and wisdom to know how best and when best to let my son watch them, but know that I am blessed to even have the opportunity.  In the meantime, I will enjoy the snuggles.

Weekly Impressions - Choose Wisely

Self-discipline isn’t easy, but it is a choice.  I’ve been struggling with self-discipline lately on several fronts, and must keep reminding myself that the choice is mine.  

On the spiritual front, do I want to follow God and experience His Joy, or do I want to focus on myself and how “bad” things are?  Then I must choose to be obedient to His Word and commandments.  

On the physical front, do I want to let my pain take over, or do I want to do what I can for my body?  Then I must exercise, drink plenty of water, and monitor my diet.  

On the family front, do I want to stay up late at night and sleep in late on the weekdays, or do I want to get to work on time and provide for my family?  Then I must go to bed on time and discipline myself to get up on time.

The problem with each of these questions is that, at times, I don’t want to do the right thing.  My feelings do not always align with what is good for me - or others, for that matter.  Staying up late and sleeping in late feels good now, but it has its consequences.  The choice is mine to be made, and I cannot base it upon my feelings.  (I also maintain that love is a choice, not a feeling, for much the same reasons.)

Colossians 2:23 is a verse that I have to Meditate on:  “These are matters which have, to be sure, the appearance of wisdom in self-made religion and self-abasement and severe treatment of the body, but are of no value against fleshly indulgence.”  What am I using for my self-discipline?  Am I using something that is of no value in my battle?

For example, what do I turn to when I am depressed?  The first question I often ask myself is, “How did I get here?”  It isn’t necessarily a bad question, but I have the tendency upon answering it, to think that that the circumstance is what sent me spiraling.  If that’s the case, then I need to change the circumstance, right?  

This is wrong for two reasons:  1) I am not in control of my circumstances (to a point), God is, and 2) it wasn’t the circumstance that made me depressed; it was the fact that I placed my hope in the circumstance instead of God, and from there, allowed my self-focus to spiral me downward (probably because I’m focused on the fact that I’m not in control of my circumstances, instead of on the fact that God is).

Once I’ve started down that path, I feel less and less like I want to turn to God and focus on Him, or be obedient to Him in order to get out of my turmoil.  Yet my feelings are of no value against fleshly indulgence.  I must discipline myself if I am to pull out of it.  

That’s hard.  However, I am not alone, “...seeing that His Divine Power has granted to us everything pertaining to life and godliness, through the true knowledge of Him who called us by His own glory and excellence.” (2 Peter 1:3)  Through the true knowledge of Him.  “I can do all things through Him who strengthens me.” (Philippians 4:13)  He gives me the strength.  “No temptation has overtaken you but such as is common to man; and God is faithful, who will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you are able, but with the temptation will provide the way of escape also, so that you will be able to endure it.” (1 Corinthians 10:13)  I’m not the only one who has struggled with this issue (though the world may have you think so, here the Bible says you’re not), and God says in His Word that He will give me a choice.

So... what will I choose this moment?  This day?  This week?  This year?  If I choose to follow God intentionally, and to be obedient to His Word, and to spend time with Him regularly, meditating upon what He has told me, then it will be easier to choose righteousness in those split-second-choices that will lead me toward or away from God; toward or away from “a good mood;” toward or away from “health.”

What are you choosing?

Knitted Baby Blankets

Between my family and my extended family, we have a few knitters among us, so my son was “well-equipped” with knitted baby blankets by the time he arrived.  He loves them!   I have found that he doesn’t have just one favorite blankie; as long as it’s knitted (or crocheted - the feel is what counts), he likes it.  That makes it much easier as far as keeping him happy.

However, the part I am most thankful for was perfectly demonstrated to me this morning.  I walked in to find my little man still asleep in his crib; he’d had a big day the day before.  He was a cute little curled up bundle... whose head and arms were wrapped snugly and entirely by his blanket.  If it were any other type of blanket, I would worry that he had suffocated himself.  A knit blanket, however, has breathing room between the stitches.  It might be possible to suffocate yourself with one, but you’d have to work pretty hard at it.

I promptly unwrapped him, and though the worrisome thought did cross my mind, he was just fine.  In fact, my sleepy little boy wanted his blanket back.  So I thank the Lord for knitted baby blankets, that I don’t need to fear for my little man’s life from something so innocuous as his blanket.  With all of the regulations, advice, facts, and myths that get thrown at new moms, it makes for one less thing to worry about (with the bonus that I can make it myself!).  

While God certainly gives me responsibilities as Mommy, I must also entrust my son’s life to the Heavenly Father.  There are a myriad things that could go wrong in that first year, especially, but I am so glad that, ultimately, God is in charge of them all.  Sometimes I must sit back and remind myself of that.  His Grace isn’t just sufficient for me; it’s sufficient for my son, too.

This Blog

You may have noticed that, though I do fall behind a day or two at times, I blog almost every day.  That was my intention from the first:  to keep myself accountable to write about something that I am thankful for each day.  I have found it so useful, because it helps to purposely bring my mind around to writing about God and what He has done in my life. That alone has helped to bring my focus around to where it should be.

God has used this blog to increase my thankfulness in general (and thus, my quality of life), but He has also used it in individual situations in my life.  When I'm struggling with depression or self-focus and it's time to write my blog, He helps me to write even though I don't feel like it.  Then, He often goes a step further and shows me something while I write, and blesses me with being able to focus on how magnificent, or powerful, or gracious, or loving (etc., etc., etc.,) He is, and find myself no longer depressed or self-focused, but Joyous in the Lord.

What a blessing He has bestowed upon me in this blog!  I hope that it has blessed you and caused you to meditate upon Him more, too.

Wind

Have you ever heard the beginning of the Irish blessing: "May the wind be always at your back...[?]"  I always took it to mean that since it's rough going against the wind, the person is wishing that the wind be helping you at your back instead of hindering you from the front.  It took on a slightly different meaning for me today.

I've been really tired today, but disciplined myself to take my walk anyway (I've found discipline to be a tremendous helper in being intentional), partly in the hopes that getting my blood flowing would help energize me.  As I labored through my brisk walk, the wind blew to and fro.  I was battling self-focus - not especially successfully - and God seemed to wait until I was paying attention.  As I looked down at the well-worn path at my feet, the wind gathered some scattered dry leaves and skittered them across the ground from behind me to dance along in front of me as I continued to walk.  It brought to mind my poem in Blossoms and the idea I wrote about in Rain:  God is the force behind the wind and leaves He sent to dance for me.  It was His reminder that He is in control of all things, and that - whether He calls the wind to my back or my front - He is the strength that will keep me going.  God is the wind at my back.

I am thankful that He used wind to remind me of His sovereignty in the midst of my struggle today.  I won't say, "May the wind be always at your back..." because God uses the wind both ways - and both are for our good.  I do pray that you (and I!) be intentional about practicing His presence and will in our lives.

Proof-Readers

I have been working on creating a book out of my first 100 thankful things.  It’s intended to be used as a springboard for your own thankful things, as well as a personal resource to use your own thankful things in your struggles.  (You can read more about it here.)  Last week, I completed the process of inserting the text, editing it, formatting everything, kerning all of the text, and indexing my thankful things.  It was ready to be proof-read.

I wanted to get a certain friend’s opinion on the book, and she had also told me that her mother was very good at proof-reading, so I thought I’d kill two birds with one stone.  I printed the book out and gave it to her last Wednesday.  She informed me that her mother had been a college English professor.  Score!

My friend gave me the book back today (Monday) completely proof-read!  I was rather amazed that her mother was already finished, and thumbed through to see what sort of notes she had left.  They’re absolutely what I needed!  They don’t affect the tone, point out where I was confusing, tell me what was good (or even enjoyable), and are just all-around helpful.

I am very thankful that God directed my book to such a capable and willing proof-reader!  Hopefully, I can use them to be a bit more clear in my thoughts.  I didn’t want to add too much polish to the work - I’m supposed to be encouraging you to write your own thankful things, and you don’t need to have polish to write about something you’re thankful for.  I think she completely understood what I was going for, and added just enough polish to make it more readable, but not daunting.  I’ll incorporate my choice of edits (which is definitely the high majority) as soon as I can, and hopefully the book will be ready for printing rather soon!

I pray that I get to see how God uses my book For His Glory - and maybe even your good.