Trusting to God's Care

I stayed home from work today.  Not due to sickness, just a combination of exhaustion and pain from my pinched nerve and fibromyalgia.  Last night when I went to bed, I knew that I would be a mess in the morning if I didn’t get a really good night’s sleep.  It’s no coincidence that the Lord chooses those times to assure that I’m relying on Him.

I pulled the covers over me last night in order to enter the land of sleep, knowing that I needed to place my hope in the Lord rather than in getting rest that night.  It was a good thing, because I woke up several times during the night, whether for the cat or my two-year-old son.  (His stall tactics - “Hug!” “Kiss!” - are still cute, even in the midst of exhaustion.)  It was a fight to keep my hope in the Lord and not to want rest more than to serve Him, but He sustained me through the night.

The verse that helps me in these situations is 1 Peter 2:23b “...while suffering, He uttered no threats, but kept entrusting Himself to Him who judges righteously[.]”  This verse comes after a command to submit to every authority that God has put above you.  It’s a reminder to me that God is in control of every authority in my life, and that I should entrust myself to Him.  I see my circumstances as God’s authority, too, and can still entrust myself to Him in the midst of those.

When the alarm went off in the morning, I just couldn’t bring myself to get up.  Both of us were tired, and we hit the snooze button for half an hour.  My husband rose and did some exercises, fed the cat, and started getting our son up before I even roused myself out of bed.  

I’ve been struggling with the balance between being lazy and needing rest of late, so I kept pushing myself.  I wasn’t worth much, even after breakfast, and my arms have felt more and more useless of late.  I still have full use of them, I think it just takes a little more effort to use them than it might if my nerve weren’t pinched.  In the end, I decided it would be better to rest for a couple of hours and then see if I’d be any good to work.  

The Lord knew that I needed rest, and while He didn’t provide it at the time that made the most sense to me, He provided it in His own timing.  I am thankful to be able to entrust myself to God’s care, because He knows what’s best far better than I do.

I am also thankful that He used my husband today to care for me.  He gave me little back rubs, encouraged me, and offered to make me lunch.  Yes, I am thankful to entrust myself to God's care.